Road Warrior Momma: The Black Hills of South Dakota

June 29, 2015 – Day 27

Gillette, WY - Rapid City, SD

244 miles (with four big stops!)

Hilton Garden Inn, Rms 214, 216

Today was a rough day, which is really unfortunate when you consider all the cool sites we got to visit. On each road trip there is one day in which the train goes off the rails, and this was the day. What follows is not pretty and I hope that you won’t think too badly of us when you’re finished reading.

We got off to an early start. I had a great night’s sleep and was the first one up. I woke Hunter so he could run, and then we had breakfast together. He also commented that it was odd that we were the only two family members up and eating, because at home we’re typically the last ones to rise. Right then and there I should’ve known something was “off.”

Our first stop of the day was Devil’s Tower National Park. About a mile from our destination, we were stopped by construction workers – for almost a half hour. It was one of those single lane deals, with an escort car that leads you down the road. We were the third car in line, and Rich was not pleased.

Once we got to the monument, it was an easy experience – except for the very steep incline you have to walk to get a decent view. Ow! My thighs and calves were feeling it. The tower is an interesting structure. The most recent scientific conclusion is that it’s an upward thrust of the earth’s surface, rising temperatures of the Earth’s Magma – or its part of an ancient volcano. There’s also an Indian legend involving a gigantic bear eating sisters that the boys liked – especially Camden who was impressed with the illustrations of the bear climbing the tower.

Next stop was Deadwood, SD – mostly for Rich, who was fascinated with the show that aired on HBO (I think). The show is based on real western outlaws who lived in the late 1800s – Bill Hickok, Calamity Jane, Colorado Bill, and some other wildly named people. The town was built on the South Dakota gold rush. Today it’s an over commercialized tourist town, populated with gaming machines. Other than lunch at a saloon, which originally opened in 1881, we visited the Mt. Moriah Cemetery, where a number of notorious outlaws are buried. I didn’t ask questions, because three years ago I dragged the kids to Sleepy Hollow Cemetery in Concord, MA, to see the graves of Louisa May Alcott, Nathaniel Hawthorne, and other literary figures. To borrow an often repeated quote of Camden’s, “We’re a weird family.”

After we saw Bill Hickok’s and Calamity Jane’s final resting places, I thought we were done. Nope, one more. Seth Bullock, apparently a friend of Hickok’s and once the Sheriff of Deadwood, is buried at the top of Mt. Moriah. So, up we went. And up, and up. It was a grueling climb and made Devil’s Tower feel like a cake walk. Oh, oh, oh - we had very unhappy campers. They were pissed. Please see exhibit A:

Things were never right after the cemetery.

Next stop: the Crazy Horse Memorial. Rich asked me why we were going more than once, so I got the impression he wanted to skip it. It was getting late, but I feared we’d regret it. It was a bit of a drive. We stopped to fill up the gas tank and have a bathroom break. Rich handled the gas, while I took the kids into the store. Audrey said she didn’t have to go and stayed in the car. When I returned, Rich said he was going to run in real quick. We all got back in the car, and as I was buckling my seat belt, Audrey said she had to use the bathroom. I said, “Too late,” because I assumed Rich would be out any second.

“But I really have to go,” she complained.

It was almost 4:00 and we had monuments to see. I said, “No, we’ll be there in twenty minutes. You can’t have to go that bad, because you didn’t have to go five minutes ago.” Well, she started screaming, yes screaming. Then the tears started. Barrett yelled, because she was yelling. And I acted very immaturely and dug in my heels in. “No.”

I know, I know. I should have let her go, I’m an ass - but I was in good company. I thought she was being ridiculous. Rich opened the car door and heard the bedlam and I’m surprised he got back in. Long story short, she got to go to the bathroom.

It started raining on our way to Crazy Horse, which meant they weren’t running the buses to take you up to the monument, because of lightening. We hung out in the visitor center and watched a movie about the building of the monument, which started in 1948 and is nowhere near complete. It’s going to be the world’s largest sculpture someday – although I never did learn an estimated completion date. Everyone in the family was tense at this point and we didn’t want to wait with the large crowd that was gathering for a bus. We took our pictures from a distance and left.

Mount Rushmore was the next destination. When I first saw it, I thought it looked small. Rich did too, and thought perhaps we felt that way because we’d just come from Crazy Horse. It’s possible.

Either way, it’s pretty impressive and incredible to see it in person. Unfortunately I don’t have many pictures of it, because the position of the sun in the sky made it difficult to capture from my camera phone. We watched a movie about the building of it, but don’t ask the children about it. In eighteen minutes, Hunter, Audrey, and Camden got up a combined eight times, to “go to the bathroom.” The film had subtitles, so Barrett read those – out loud.

On the way to the hotel Audrey and Hunter got into a huge fight and I couldn’t even tell you what it was about. And Mom and Dad didn’t have the energy to intervene. Once at the hotel, I handled check-in, while Rich unloaded the car. Despite the fact that I had called two days prior, and that morning, to verify our reservations and secure connecting rooms, and was promised it was a “done deal,” we were given two rooms on separate floors. I’m ashamed to reveal that I was not very nice about it. I didn’t scream or anything, but I was very cross. As I was explaining the situation, and pulling the autism card, almost as if on cue, Barrett made an appearance. He was performing a song about his mother being a baker, and excitedly started jumping up and down, with is arms flapping like a bird. I whipped around to see if any of his siblings were minding him, to discover his twin lounging on a couch in the lobby oblivious to all around him.

I yelled at Hunter to get Barrett outside, and then continued negotiations with the front desk. Not even one minute later, Camden screamed Audrey’s name, and started crying. I turned around again, to see the front of his shirt soaked, and Audrey standing next to him - laughing. Not sure what went down, but she was holding a cup. I had to once again order the children out to the parking lot – where I could see Rich standing in the middle of a pile of luggage, and no luggage cart. At this point, a line was forming behind me at the desk.

Eventually we got it worked out, but only one room was ready. I rounded up the troops and headed to the room. I was following Rich, who was pushing the cart, and as we turned the corner some of the bags fell off. One was our huge Thirty-One Utility Tote, which is our road trip supply bag – and everything spilled out. Rich stayed silent, but his body language spoke volumes.

Not once, not twice, but three times, from the lobby to our room, we received pitying comments from other guest. “Oh you have your hands full!” “Been there, done that, never again.” Etc…

It was a comedy of errors getting all the luggage into the room, because the entrance was tight, and it was one room, and Hunter and Audrey, who miraculously were now chummy-chummy, plowed into the room in a flurry to get to the remote, so they could watch wrestling.

Stick a fork in me, I was done! Rich and I were snapping at each other and at one point I flipped the bird to one of my children, behind their back. I could not handle another task. We ordered room service and called it a day.

As Scarlet O’Hara would say – tomorrow is another day!

Cammyism of the Day:

I really don’t have one, but he did do something that sums up the day. I guess he was picking his nose and Audrey was mad, because she was sitting right beside him. She screamed at him, and Rich told him he was gross and to stop. He said okay. Then Audrey screamed again – and told us he put the boogers back in his nose. At least he didn’t eat them.